My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
God, I missed his penis.
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