Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I don't think brook has ever known best
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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