She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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