I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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