She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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