I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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