There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
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