Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
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