I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
