By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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