I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize