How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
Randomize
