I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
