So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Drunkenly found an error on my bar tab last night. THANK YOU ACCOUNTING.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
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