4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
