Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
She announced her abortion via fbk
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
Randomize
