Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
