therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
last night I used snow as a chaser
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
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