come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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