I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
