I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
