do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
