this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I didn't notice because vodka
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Randomize
