ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
