I wanna bring you to show and tell
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize