Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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