i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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