haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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