I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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