Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
Randomize
