yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
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