$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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