doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I found a phone book at the party and started calling everyone with my last name asking if they wanted to form a club. I'm meeting one for brunch tomorrow...
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
