And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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