Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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