he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
