omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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