Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
