brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
