so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
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