i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
i came on her dog
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
Randomize