Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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