Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
