Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i would punch a child for taco bell
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
