no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Randomize
