So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Randomize
