that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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