Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
You ate ashes out of my bong
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
