How'd it feel making her break her religion?
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
