Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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